Her heart ached as she studied his wrinkled face, trying to etch it in her memory. He was one of the kindest men she had ever known and now he was making his last stand against the cancer that ravaged his body. They had just said a short prayer and a tear slipped from his eye as he gripped her hand firmly. She glanced around the small room in the hospice wing of the hospital recalling their chance meeting two years ago in the AA group that met in the basement of that very facility. He was old enough to be the grandfather she never had, and he had come to be her greatest source of encouragement. He always seemed like the guy who had it all together.
Rather than engaging in small talk she somehow felt it was appropriate to have a more meaningful conversation. So she cleared her throat and softly asked, “What would you do different in life if you could start over?”
In a labored whisper he gave her this startling answer: “Oh honey, I did start over. In my younger years I was a scoundrel. I hurt people, I cheated others and myself and I was determined to do things my way. When I hit rock bottom God sent me a good neighbor. He was different. He didn’t drink, cuss or talk bad about his wife. He was one of those guys who seemed like a goodie two shoes. He bugged me because he seemed to have it all together and I didn’t think my life and family could ever be like his.”
With a faraway look in his eyes he continued, “My neighbor shocked me when he offered to help me restore my classic Mustang – at no charge. Turns out he was a normal guy. Over the next few years we would have dozens of life-changing conversations. The most important talk was the one where he explained what Christians meant when they talked about being “born again” and “resurrection”.
“Tell me about that,” she interrupted, “I have never quite understood that terminology or why people would be willing to die for that whole Christianity thing.”
“It’s really all about starting over,” he explained, as he feebly sipped some water and placed his paper cup back on the portable food tray. “When I began telling my neighbor all the bad things I had done and how much I had messed up my life, he began helping me understand that the “Good News” was that I could start over. You can’t imagine how much hope that gave me. When I pressed him for more information he showed me a very simple but powerful scripture that was spoken by St. Peter to people who were asking what they should do to fix their lives. He said, ‘Repent, and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost.’” (See Acts 2:38)
More tired now, the dying man took a deep breath and continued, “In great detail my neighbor explained to me repentance was like dying to one way of living and turning to God’s way. Then he showed me that baptism was like burying that old life – that is why they put people all the way under the water in Jesus’ name. Finally he helped me understand that being filled with the Spirit is like resurrecting to a new life.”
She was a bit surprised at the fresh energy that filled the old man’s voice as he recalled his own experience. “When it dawned on me that I could start over I jumped at the opportunity and it was the smartest thing I ever did. I repented and was baptized. When I came out of the water I felt so forgiven and clean. I even spoke in an unknown language just like the disciples! My only regret is that I did not start over sooner.” Having told his story, he smiled and drifted off to sleep.
Now she understood what she needed in her life. Next Sunday was Easter Sunday and she purposed in her heart that this Easter would be the day she would start over.